When I met Emily Wood for coffee in early 2024, I had no clue she’d help me launch into a new phase of life. I didn’t even realize I was craving something new.
I had been living in the Des Moines area for a year, working in marketing at a local nonprofit and writing a Substack newsletter on the side. That newsletter connected me with Suzanna de Baca, then president and CEO of Business Publications Corp., who then connected me with Emily, the Business Record’s special projects editor.
After some freelance work for a few months, Emily approached me with a question: Would I like to apply for a full-time opening with the Business Record team?
I hadn’t even considered looking for a new opportunity. I liked my nonprofit. I enjoyed the work and felt supported and valued by my team. I had no reason to leave.
It’s easy to recognize you need a change when you’re in an unhappy situation. When you dread arriving at work, or every moment of a relationship is spent fighting, or you no longer find joy in previous activities, it can become clear that these situations aren’t working for you anymore.
But what about when the choice to make a change isn’t so obvious?
It can take a lot for women to decide to leave their jobs. We’re less likely than men to apply for a job if we don’t meet 100% of the qualifications, and we’re less likely to apply to jobs when the listed duties are vague. It creates a culture of hesitancy, and we often end up staying in places where our full potentials aren’t being realized.
I quickly realized that nobody would tell me the right move to make, because nobody could know what the right move was but me. And figuring out the right move would take some serious self-reflection.
Obviously, I decided to take the leap and join the team at BPC. But it wasn’t an easy decision at which to arrive. I discovered some valuable lessons about making life choices along the way.
Give your brain and your gut equal consideration. I tend to put a lot of stock into whether or not something feels right when making a decision. While that can be valuable in low-stakes situations like which book I want to read next or what restaurant to choose on a Saturday night, it’s not exactly a foolproof way of keeping your life in order. What felt exciting about beginning a new job (new routines, meeting new people, feeling challenged) in conjunction with what I knew would objectively further my career (writing about new subjects, gaining a larger audience) helped me feel confident that I was making the right choice for all aspects of my life.
The right decision will satisfy both your now and your future. It can seem tempting to choose a path with immediate gratification. After all, we’re a culture that loves to feel good right away. But those decisions often mean missing out on growth opportunities that can lead to something better in the future. On the flip side, many people choose a path of suffering in hopes it leads them to a sense of enlightenment that is far from promised. I encourage you to consider what will make your life feel satisfying now while providing building blocks for the future you want. Your life is made up of all of the past, present and future moments. Make sure they all add value in some way.
There’s no shame in going after what you want. Telling my former bosses that I accepted a new job was a difficult conversation. I worked for two kind, caring women who did a lot for me in the two years I was at the organization. I really didn’t want to disappoint them. But as I meekly explained my reasons for leaving, they each separately extolled me not to apologize. “This is a great opportunity for you,” they both reminded me. While my sadness about leaving points to the excellent work relationships we had built, their encouragement was a reminder that I deserved to strive for bigger and better things for myself.
Get comfortable with discomfort. While I’m not someone who believes in suffering for the sake of suffering — we have one life and wasting it feeling terrible is foolish — I do believe we have to make peace with discomfort in order to reach our highest plane of existence. For me, that looks like letting go of my need to know everything. I used to feel a sort of shame about the experiences I hadn’t had or the knowledge I hadn’t acquired. Now these appear to me as moments of opportunity to become a more realized individual. I also used to irrationally fear regret about decisions, but I’ve accepted that that’s not something I can control. I can only prepare myself to gain the most out of every experience. I had no way of knowing if this job would satisfy me more than my last one, but I knew that those things I mentioned above, like meeting new people and writing about different subjects, would benefit me no matter what direction my career takes in the future.
Categories: Career Pathways & Advancement
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